the take home folder vol 64
no toys until christmas / normalize tightening the financial reins / show up / books for teachers to sign / + more
welcome to the take home folder
Happy Easter if you are celebrating today. Our family gathering was postponed due to illness in the extended family, so we have a quiet family day on tap. Looking forward to it!
my sunday questions
What is something I can do for our home?
What is something I can do for our family?
What is something I can do for myself?
Today for me it’s gathering up our winter boots, snow pants, and coats and putting them into storage in the basement (if it snows again, you can blame me!), enjoying some family time, and getting into bed early to read.
here’s this week’s take home folder, enjoy!
one // show up
We had Todd’s grandma’s funeral last week. And the most heartwarming surprise was how many people showed up to remember and celebrate her life. In the past I have felt a bit unsure about attending funerals for family members of friends or people I hadn’t seen in a long time. But her funeral reminded me that it is always ok to show up to support someone going through a loss and honor the life of the person who passed away.
two // books for teachers to sign
Something I’ve been doing for my kids is having their teachers write a message in a picture book that I plan to give them in the future (high school graduation?). Here’s my process:
I email the teacher and ask if they would be willing to write a note in a book
I give them PLENTY of time - the end of the school year is bananas, so I wouldn’t want to add this to their plate in the last couple weeks of school
I drop the book off in an envelope at the front office and ask the office staff to put it in the teacher’s mailbox
They write a message and either send it home in my kid’s backpack in a sealed envelope or return it to the front office where I can pick it up
My boys are still in elementary school and this has worked well so far. If I decide to continue this into middle school and beyond, I’ll have to rethink how to execute it. I have kept the books as a surprise (kids don’t know about them), but many people have shared that their kids do know and are just as excited.
Book ideas:
three // bbq pulled pork
I made this BBQ Pulled Pork in the Instant Pot last week and it was delicious and easy. The only modification I made was increasing the Instant Pot cooking time. When I made it as directed, the meat still felt tough to shred. I remembered that Kate from Naptime Kitchen taught me that if a roast is tough/hard to shred, it just means it needs more time. So I put it in 30 minutes longer and it was falling apart.
We served on Hawaiian rolls with Grillos Pickles and did chips and coleslaw as sides. However, the meat is super versatile! It would also be amazing in a quesadilla or on nachos or in a rice bowl.
four // no toys until christmas
Ok, don’t throw tomatoes at me. But we aim not to buy our kids non-necessities outside of Christmas, Easter, and their birthdays.
One part is to save my sanity and not have a constant influx of stuff into our house. (Trust me, they have plenty.)
The other part is that I don’t want them to become accustomed to constantly getting new stuff. It’s not normal to get a new toy every time we pop into Target. Or to play with something at a friend’s house and have it delivered to our doorstep the next day.
Wiggle room - books (I do buy them books throughout the year), mayyyybe baseball cards.
So, at this point, if they want something, they can add it to their Christmas list or consider buying it with their own money. We have never really verbalized this “rule” to them - they’re just used to this being the way we live and don’t really ask for much. (I would imagine maybe they’ll ask for more as they get older?) Again, they have everything they need and many things they want. I promise they’re ok. What’s not ok is rampant overconsumption.
five // spending less
I get the feeling that more families than we realize are struggling to get by financially right now. Maybe you’re fortunate to be continuing on as normal, but it’s important to recognize that others are having a harder time. Everything feels is more expensive and that takes a toll over time.
What makes this even more complicated in 2025 is social media. The highlight reel. The glamorous life of luxury travel and constant new things and flashy experiences and oh yeah - new homes/big renovations = new content to share. (None of these things are necessarily bad, they’re just very on display on the ‘gram.)
I want to normalize hunkering down financially if that feels like the right move for your family. That may look like building or bulking up your emergency fund, shopping secondhand first, getting creative with meals based on what you already have and/or what’s on sale, working to eliminate unnecessary monthly expenses, etc. My friend Lydia Senn recently made a YouTube video with some great ideas.
There is so much joy to be found in living below your means and leaning into the simple things in life. We’re in it together.
see you right back here next week,
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I’m a high school teacher and wrote in a book for a 10th grader. I think the kid still doesn’t know his mom is doing this for him! Honestly, her method was the same as yours now! She explained that this was a tradition she’s been doing since kindergarten - the only difference is he has 7 teachers now, so she said she picked me because we had really connected.
Her email actually said, “The idea is something you've noticed about him at this stage of his life and a wish for him. Like 2-3 lines. I chose you because he talks about how impactful you've been as his teacher and we are truly grateful.”
I didn’t spend too much time looking through the book but wow it was sweet to add my words in between notes from teachers who’d all seen such different sides of him! I aggressively second asking a ways in advance of the end of school though :)
Love the no new toys until Christmas unwritten rule and normalizing living a normal life without all the glam new extras. Our girls are now 10 & 13 and we have had many recent convos about what they buy vs what we buy. As you noted these conversations do increase the older they get. But we have kept a firm hand in keeping them accountable for buying their own extras and learning how to budget their own money. Well done.